Statistics. So often they work in our favor. 95% of people in plane crashes survive. 85% of people get pregnant within the first year of trying. You’re twice as likely to die being crushed under a vending machine than you are in a terrorist attack. There’s a 2% chance you’ll develop pancreatitis after a biopsy of the pancreas. There’s a 1% chance your flight will be canceled due to mechanical issues. Out of 1000 births, there is a o.001% chance your infant will die from SIDS.
Not until well into our infertility treatments did I start paying much attention to statistics. Right around when the chances of success for In-Vitro Fertilization in a 38 year old woman became important. As we entered the Great Deceptive World of Adoption a year later, we felt we were continually falling into smaller and smaller crappy percentages. (That’s a whole other entry, but anyone who says ‘you can always adopt’ is utterly, infuriatingly naive.) With Anna, we finally garnered a tiny statistic we were THRILLED to be a part of. Sooo many of those same infuriatingly naive people said ‘once you go to adoption, you’ll get pregnant’ when in fact that only happens to about one in 500,000 couples. That’s 0.000002%, by the way. Our horrible luck had all funneled into one, single, gorgeous turnaround of fate.
So what percentage then, do you think, is there of precious, healthy Anna dying without explanation a few minutes before she entered the world? One in a million? I’d say more, when we were one of only 500,000 couples who got that spontaneous pregnancy in the midst of infertility. One in 5 million? Probably getting closer. When we found out we were going to be induced rather than getting to experience labor, Brad’s comment was “given what we’ve been through this far, we shouldn’t be surprised.” Little did we know inducing would be the least of it.
It would appear that we haven’t graduated from this effed-up club of crappy percentages, and that those associated with us are in danger by proximity. Brad’s father made the 2% to get pancreatitis. My parents, after 3 days of carefully watching flights so they might get here on standby, finally tried for the one that would likely work, only to have it cancelled due to mechanical issues after they arrived at the airport.
Let this be a warning unto you. Love, play, work and interact with us at your own risk.